Dawn It!

It dawned on me at work this morning: dawn was knocking at the window. So I stepped out into the cold wind to capture the dawn for you, because, gosh dawn it, it was quite dramatic for a dawn. And so I dawn you with pink robes of ruby light. And I dawn you...just in general.

Uh Ohhhh.

Yo! This be Zoe C. here and I be welcomin' my bro's new girl Stephanie to da house. Yeah, you know what I's say'n. Yeah, a'ight, I be see'n Stephanie's worried mouth. No need to worry, girl! I's perfectly normal. Perfectly. Word. Peace out, yos.

Castle In The Sky!

Hey there, is that Mount Hood floating above the clouds? I think we all know the answer.

The Zoedith Christmas Tree Ornament.

Meredith gave this Christmas Tree Ornament to me because it was created in our form. They love Lesbians here. In fact, they didn't even make a hetero ornament, Meredith told me so. She also told me "it's so ugly." Didn't you mean to say it's fucking hott, Muriel?

The People...Didn't Spoke.

The People didn't spoke, and so perhaps nor will I. I post and I post, yet receive so few comments, even for such gems as "Embarrassing Questions." What went wrong? Did I make too many spelling mistakes? Did stir feelings in your heart that you had tried so hard to forget? Fuck Muriel, I don't know. And so I sit here alone, pondering whether to brave another day in this quiet world. I think, perhaps Zoe's Photo Journal will die today. Yes, yes it will die. Nothing will change its course. Nothing! Nothing at all so don't even try! Nothing...except for maybe The People, Big or Little, if they rise up and Spoke again.

Soft Pink.

Pretty skin, shiny eyelids, little nosie and baby mouth. This is Sarah with her three month old baby girl, Irelin. Pretty girl. Sarah's pretty too!

Embarrassing Questions.

Mom, where do lampshades come from?

The Paparazzi Has No Soul.

What has The World come to? This we asked of The World when the Paparazzi ruthlessly attacked Meredith and Me at our quiet Thanksgiving Dinner. So far, we haven't heard back.

It's Dinner Time!

So scrumptious you could eat us for dinner! Yes yes.

Oh Good Doggy Head.

Look at Mr. Poopy! I have lots of nice pictures of him because I stalked him at the Farmer's Market on Saturday. I wanted to ask him where he got that really nice jacket but I was too shy. Oh Mr. Cutehead Poopy Doo Doo. Doo Doo.

Deluxe Fucking Furnishings.

Did you know that I could easily afford a matching bedroom furniture set? I did. I'm fucking loaded. And I like to show off my material goods. Take a look at my Signature Cardboard Collection.

The Jewelry Box.
Some of us aren't lucky enough to have a Lesbian Girlfriend to buy us one.

The Entertainment Center/Night Stand.
This piece also slides out to triple as a Painting Table.

The Shelving Unit.
Shelves such valuables as the bubblegum-scented '13 Going on 30,' the ever vital Oxford Japanese-English Dictionary, and the Boggle.

The Underwear Drawer.
Probably my favorite part of the house.

Oh my! Stop looking at my underwear! Well my word, I neva.

"I Shall Single Handedly Revolutionize the Promotional Video Genre. This I Promise You." - Z. Carter 2006

So Zoë Carter proclaimed one Autumn Afternoon. "I have seized this uncommissioned project, this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, this ‘promotion’ if you will, to promote the city of Portland, Oregon through digital video!” Despite her reputation as a Flake, Carter enthusiastically promises testimonials and musical dance sequences. And noting that she has always had a thing, I mean, she has always had a special place in Her Heart for the little people (okay fine! yes, she has a crush on the little people), Carter is generously reaching out to you for support, ideas and special requests. What do YOU want to see in Portland’s Promotional Video? Please Post.

Oh How I Wish He Were My Friend.

Look at this guy. He's Cute. He's Wild. He's Meant for Me.

Blue and White: That's Me Tonight.

Remember that Stupid, Stupid Boston mug? Well here's the Portland version. Stupid Motherfucker.

P.S. Forevermore Black Tea shall make me think of You, Sweet Renee.

The World's Greatest Written Gift.

The World's Greatest Written Gift was given to one Lucky Girl. That Girl was me, on Monday, October 23, 2006, and this is what it said:

"ZOEDETH (sic),
Oh baby! What a delight to fucking write to you in 'Bees. We love your hot apples, eating kants, and planning for dreams/Halloween. What adventures are you plotting while we wait impatiently? Sometimes while pooping, thoughts wander - Oregon what a shithole! Just imagine - Boston embracing your firm buttocks!
Love,
Sam, Kathy! Jill
P.S. We all write this, one word at a time. Funny, eh?"

Thank you.

My Inner Halloween.

Just because I look like a Witch doesn't mean I don't love Dogs.

'Zoë' Pilot a Success.

New TV series 'Zoë' garners respectable reviews. Carter Co. announces plans to air the show through the Spring Season.

'Zoë' features a flighty black and white girl who is followed by a compact electric fan that blows her hair around during her calm adventures in Portland, Oregon.

Catch 'Zoë' via phone, email, or live in person, if you're lucky.

News Flash! Meredith Moran Parks Lil' Blue.

See one Meredith Moran standing beside the vehicle otherwise known as Lil' Blue. Believe it: she parallel parked the hell out of that car, and it took no less than thirty minutes. Don't let the mile-long empty space deceive you: this was the most difficult parking-job Meredith Moran and her passenger, Zoe Carter, have ever attempted. Lacking power-steering and a functioning emergency brake, Lil' Blue gave Meredith Moran the workout of a lifetime. She suffered a heat-induced panic attack while the sweet and helpful Zoe Carter looked on in hysterics. Baby.

Back in the Bathroom (Baby).

There is no better place for a flash photography shoot than the public bathroom. Besides, it not our fault the paparazzi continues to follow us everywhere.

The Trampoline of Confusion and Static Electricity.

This would be Ashley, Ali, Jennie, and Chelsea on yet another fuckin beautiful lazy ass weekend afternoon in Forest Grove.

Paparazzi.

Oh yes: they came to town.

In The Bathroom (Baby).

I like making friends in the bathroom. Today I met an older man and his cat at the Victorian Dessert House.










Have you made any friends in The Bathroom lately?

A Return to the Night.

My and Meredith's first night out on the town since we came to Oregon. Complete with Makeup, Food, Hardcore Laughter (my abs are actually sore right now), a Drag Show and Radical Dancing at Bollywood Hip Hop Night. We partied with a couple of the Fucking Raddest Girls in Oregon: Ashley and Jacklyn. Don't worry, you'll meet them someday. Naturally, Kevin joined us for the Drag Show part.

Fuck yeah, Muriel.

Comparative Occupational Settings: An Introduction.

This is the park on the river across the street from where I work at Starbucks. I often lunch here. I guess it's okay, but it's not like Faneuil Hall where I couldn't walk or breathe and was in Super Kill Mode. There aren't even any Stupid Idiots around. Even the population of Crazies, Freaks, Fuckers, Bitches, Whores and Putas more closely matches the National Per Capita Average. Why did I even bother coming here?

Special Memory Book.

Look what I found! The best Easter story ever! There are so many eggs and so many bunnies in this story and I love them. Did anyone else have this book as a child?

No.

Sometimes I paint really badly. I'm sorry.

I'm a Good Friend.

When Sara came to Portland this weekend I smushed her face, like any good friend would do.

Roommates United.

Me, Meredith and Roses. The Englewood Underground together again.

Cookies are Exciting!

Gee whiz life is great!

A Likely Family.

Kim and Cliff and Mom and Lee. In Eugene at the Saturday Market.

Blackberries, Baby.

The land of blackberries is where I'm at, baby.

Day One!

Yo babies!
I hope to post a notable photograph for each of my days! How fucking delightful, Muriels.